قانون پنج ثانیه

104 - The 5 Second Rule

Hey there, Kevin here, with another episode of the Feel Good English podcast. The only English learning podcast on planet Earth that is not only helping you become more fluent in English but more fluent in life as well.

Teaching you lessons based on personal development, being better at business, and being a better human being! That’s different, yes?

My first question for you is…what’s up?

How do you answer that very common question? Well, you repeat it back…”what’s up, Kevin!”

Some more questions….

When you have an idea about doing something, something you know would be valuable to your life, do you often stop and think about it, then end up not doing that “something”?

Let’s say you think about calling someone you haven’t talked to in a long time. It seems like a good idea for a second or two, but then something inside you stops you from doing it.

You come up with, come up with means to create, you come up with a reason for not calling that person.

And, so you don’t call them.

This happens a lot! It happens to me, a lot! There’s a voice inside my head that keeps me from doing what’s important.

Does this happen to you?

Well, if you’re totally impulsive, it does happen to you, I’m sure.

According to the author of a book called “The 5 Second Rule”, the author’s name is Mel Robbins, the secret to being more confident and successful comes down to making the right decision in the 5 seconds after you have an idea.

You can’t let those 5 seconds kill your dreams!

Sounds a little intense, but after this lesson, it should make more sense.

So anyway, I am going to use a video of Mel Robbins, the author of the book “5 seconds”, to teach you the concept behind this 5-second rule, and also teach you some English used in the video.

Some advanced English stuff.

So I’ll play a bit of the video, listen to that, then I’ll talk about it a bit, so listen to me too!

And as always, if you want to benefit from this lesson the most, repeat it as much as possible! The more, the merrier!

Before I get into the lesson, want to let you know that I send out a weekly email as well, filling this email with a little motivation, a little, knowledge, a little fun, and at times a little education as well.

Want to get this email? Just got to www.feelgoodenglish.com and sign up! Look for the bear. He is there, to help you join Feel Good, so you can feel good too!

Now let’s learn about the 5 second rule from Mel Robbins.

“I’m going to teach you though, the very very simple way to get what you want. There’s only one rule when it comes to productivity, there’s only one rule when it comes to success there is only one rule to getting everything you’ve ever wanted, and here it is… you’re never going to feel like it. Ever. “

So she’s going to teach you the one thing you need to know about productivity. She uses the phrase “when it comes to”, (when it comes to productivity, when it comes to success), which means “when considering”. So when it comes to (something), it means when considering that thing. When it comes to fitness, for example, you need to consider, and then whatever you think its important about fitness.

There are a million views on fitness.

So let me ask you now, if you could do anything, at this moment, and $$ or time wasn’t an issue, what would you do? It could be anything. For me? I think I feel like flying to…Spain, Barcelona, and sipping wine and eating cheese by the beach. I’ve never been there, sounds like a lot of fun. That’s what I feel like doing right now. And you? What do you feel like doing, right now….Think about it, and tell me what you’d like to do.

Speak you answer out loud now.

10 second pause.

Oh wow! That sounds like fun! I think I’ll join you.

“So it’s a lot like kids. If you think about it, what’s your job as a parent?

It’s to make kids do the things they don’t feel like doing, so they can grow up and move out and become independent adults. And the funny thing is, when you grow up and moved out your parents never said to you, “guess what, you are a total pain in the rear end, you never feel like doing anything; you don’t feel like doing your homework, you don’t feel like going out, you don’t feel like making your bed, you don’t feel like saying hello to strangers, you don’t feel like using your manners, you don’t feel like cleaning your room, good luck to you! “ So there’s a lot of “feel like” or “don’t feel like” right there. She says a parent’s job is to make kids, to force kids, to do what they don’t feel like doing. It makes sense, right? If your parent, mother or father, or both, always make it easy for you, and don’t make you, don’t force you, to do things you don’t want to do, you’ll grow up to be someone who always wants to be comfortable. Always wants the easy path. And if you listen to my podcast, you know that always taking the easy, comfortable path won’t help you achieve the life of your dreams. You have to do things you don’t feel like doing, every day!

And speaking of “growing up, the speaker in the video uses a couple phrasal verbs here. To grow up is used for people, to get older. Different than “grow”, grow up is used when you are talking about, like I said people, more specifically when children become adults. If your friend is acting immature, like a child, you’d say, “come on dude, grow the hell up! Stop acting like a child”

And another phrasal verb here, to move out. To move out, means to leave a house or apartment permanently. I guess you could move out of a city or a town as well. To move is just about going from one place to another, but when adding “out” to move out, it means you are going to stop living somewhere. Maybe it’s the first time you are leaving your family’s house. You’d say, “I’m going to move out of my parents’ house after I get married!” Or you could say, “my roommate is a complete disaster. She’s dirty, loud, and doesn’t help pay the bills. I need to move out ASAP!! (asap is as-soon-as-possible, by the way)

“You’ve learned a ton about the brain, now the brain is going to screw you over, the brain is going to go into autopilot, the brain is going to tell you it doesn’t feel like doing things, it’s trickery, you now know that. So how do you be effective with yourself, knowing that you’re never going to feel like doing all the work that it takes to have this business be everything that it possibly could? So you’re going to use the five-second rule, and what that means is this.”

Our brain doesn’t like change, doesn’t like staying in uncomfortable situations. And why would it? Our brains try to keep us safe and comfortable. Which makes tons (a lot of) sense. Trying to keep us comfortable makes tons of sense. But, because of this tendency for our brains to keep us safe, it can consequently make us less productive, effective, less effective with life. It stops us from taking risks. She says it can screw us over.

To screw over, a phrasal verb, means to “cheat someone, or ruin their chances in a game or other situation.” Le

chances of winning. Or at work, your boss gives you a project on a Friday that must be finished by Monday. Now you have to work on the weekend. He totally screwed you over.

Now your turn, when was the last time someone screwed you over?

Someone screwed you over. Think about it. ………. Now tell me about it.

Say, Kevin, the other day (this person) screwed me over because they (did something).

123 go…..

Damn, that person sucks!!!

“From the moment that you have the idea, I should e-mail out the fall collection, I should go through the contact list for my college or university and reach out to people, I should go through my contact lists and invite twenty-three people this week, to just take the dogs for a walk, I should make a request of a friend and ask if I can come to a presentation at lunch at his law firm. From the second you have that idea, you’ve only got five seconds to take action, otherwise, it’s gone.” So here is the big idea, the solution. From the moment you have an idea, you have 5 seconds to act before your brain tries to prevent you from doing something, prevent you from doing (important grammar structure). That’s it. And I am sure you have experienced this before. You think of something, wait more than 5 seconds, then talk yourself out of doing it. You waited too long.

That’s it, 5 seconds. A simple solution that can change your life. Have a big idea? Act on it before the 5 seconds is up.

A thought I had, and you might also think, “Well, what if I act on everything I think of doing? I’d be like an animal, with no discretion!” Well, what I think is that sometimes we don’t need to act fully, going all in, sometimes maybe just taking the first step, one little action is enough. So you have an idea of quitting your job, finding another job.

You don’t need to call your boss in the next five seconds and say “I quit!

Go screw yourself!” But, you could, in the next five seconds, search for websites that post jobs. Start by signing up for notifications from job sites, so you can start looking for other jobs. That would be a reasonable 5-second action.

Or let’s say you see an interesting English course online. As soon as you see it, you have 5 seconds to buy it! So buy it right now! No, don’t do that, but a good action would be to, maybe email the creator of the course. Ask him doubts you have about the course. Don’t hesitate more than 5 seconds on doing that.

So not being foolish, meaning making dumb decisions all the time, but taking the next step, within 5 seconds, if it is a big decision.

Now calling your mom? That’s not a big decision. So when you think of that, do it within 5 seconds. Make your mom happy!

And that’s it for today’s lesson. The 5 Second Rule.

Here’s my action step for the week. You can follow along if you want.

You know what the snooze button is? That’s when you extend your alarm time. The alarm goes off, but you push the button that makes it turn off, but only for 10 minutes or so. Then it will go off again. An alarm goes off. It gives you ten more minutes (or sometimes you push it ten times, sleep for another hour or two) but this week I am going to use the 5-second rule. After my alarm goes off, I have five seconds to jump out of bed before my brain tells me to stay in bed, stay comfortable. Let’s do it! Start the day off right, choosing the energizing path instead of the comfortable one.

If you want a transcript to this episode, you can get it at feelgoodenglish.com Become a Feel Good Member and get transcripts to this and every other episode of the podcast. You’ll also be supporting the show, and that’s nice, thank you for that!

And until next time, choose wisely, but choose quickly. Don’t let your brain trick you into being comfortable all the time.

Thanks for listening, bye bye!