The White Elephant, Episode 26, Sick"

Gordon
Right, gather round everybody. I want you to try my new recipe. Ostrich lasagne.

Peter Ostrich?! As in the very tall bird?

Gordon Yes, and a very healthy and lean meat to eat. Now, would you like to try some or is it too sophisticated for you Peter?

Peter
No - I’d love to try some. Mmm delicious. Very… ostrichy.

Mary Tastes a bit like chicken.

Ceilia
Yes… something of an after taste… it’s a bit like… mouldy cheese.

Gordon
I am sick to death of your comments Ceilia. I’m trying to create a new menu - as you asked me to.

Peter
Ooh, sorry, I feel a bit off colour .

Ceilia
Gordon, that’s not a good sign.

Mary
Actually, I feel a bit queasy … sorry Gordon, something’s not quite right.

Gordon Is this some kind of sick joke ?

Ceilia
No sick joke Gordon… errr… I need to dash.

Gordon
Typical! I’m sick of this … I try to make them something new and they just make a fuss. It smells alright to me.

FROM THE RESTAURANT Waiter! Waiter!

Gordon Alright, keep your hair on, we’ll be there in a minute. Look at this kitchen, now I’ve got to cook, clean and serve. Honestly, you wouldn’t get this at The Poison Ivy.

Ceilia Something in that made me as sick as a dog .

Gordon
Well, I’m as sick as a parrot - I’ve been preparing this all morning.

Peter
Parrot? Did you put parrot in instead of ostrich?

Mary No he didn’t Peter… it was certainly ostrich… look, it’s a week out of date.

FROM THE RESTAURANT Waiter! Waiter!