The White Elephant, Episode 1, Panic!"

Ceilia/Gordon/Mary
5… 4… 3… 2… 1…

Gordon That’s it! It is exactly one week since The White Elephant opened and still not one…

Peter …customer!

Ceilia What? A customer! Are you sure?

Peter Yes. He’s in there sitting down.

Gordon Well, what does he want?

Peter I don’t know. I didn’t ask him.

Mary Chill out! I think it would be a really good idea to go and ask him.

Peter
Right. OK. Wait there.

Peter Right, he says he wants the duck eggs and polenta fries but with a small change…

Gordon Yes?

Peter
He wants a hen’s egg instead of a duck’s and… potato fries instead of polenta fries.

Gordon What?! So he wants egg ‘n’ chips. I have not worked in some of the world’s top restaurants to end up cooking egg and chips!.

Ceilia
Gordon, Gordon keep your hair on ! Customer’s is always right - and thank goodness we’ve got one. So, let’s try to keep him happy and - who knows - he might bring his friends next time.

Gordon Keep them happy?! It’s alright for them to be happy, what about me? Egg and chips… I ask you…

Ceilia
Don’t get your knickers in a twist Gordon.

Mary
Look, why don’t I go and speak to him and see if wouldn’t rather have Gordon’s duck egg and polenta fries.

Ceilia
Thank you Mary.

Gordon
Well?

Mary He’s gone.