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How to Surround Yourself with the Doers When It Comes to English and Life
Lindsay: This is an All Ears English Podcast, Episode 215: “How to Surround Yourself with the Doers When It Comes to English and Life.”
Gabby: Welcome to the All Ears English Podcast, where you’ll finally get real, native English conversation with your hosts, Lindsay McMahon, the ‘English Adventurer’ and Gabby Wallace, the ‘Language Angel’, from Boston, USA.
Lindsay: Today we are back with our temporary co-host, Christie, the ‘Fearless New Yorker’. Let’s get to the show.
Lindsay: Who’s in your social circle? Today we’re gonna (going to) talk about why you need to hang out with the dreamers and the doers and not the naysayers. And we’ll give you one key action that you can do to build up a great supportive social circle.
Lindsay: Hey, Christie. What’s happening today?
Christie: Hey, Lindsay. (Uh), good stuff, good stuff (crosstalk).
Lindsay: How are you doing today? You feeling good?
Christie: I’m feeling fantastic. How are you doing?
Lindsay: Good. I am so excited to talk about – today is (uh) – well, today, first of all is a ‘Deep Thought Thursday’ and, (you know), we have a really interesting topic that we wanna (want to), (you know), chat about today and the idea is how important is it – (you know), I think we’ve both learned this – how important is it to surround yourself with the right people.
Christie: Yeah, it’s super important. (Uh), every day is a trying day like we talked about how I’m not actually fearless. I have a lot of fear and really the only way I get through it is by surrounding myself with positive, loving people.
Lindsay: Yeah, I like that you said that. So you said that a few episodes back that you, you’re not fearless, you have fear. And I appreciate that you’re saying that because we all have fear, (you know).
Lindsay: (I mean), an-and actually, I think it shows a lot of strength to be able to admit that you have fear. I think the people who don’t admit that they have fear, (you know), those guys, I think they’re in trouble, (like) when you can’t admit that.
Lindsay: But when you can just sit down and say “Hey, I’m afraid right now.” (Like), “I’m afraid,” then that’s actually powerful.
Christie: (Uhn), (uhn).
Lindsay: Christie, what’s today’s quote that we’re gonna (going to) chat about? Can you go ahead and read that for our audience?
Christie: Yeah. All right. So I like this quote. It says, “Surround yourself with the dreamers and the doers, the believers and the thinkers. But most of all, surround yourself with those who see greatness within you even when you don’t see it yourself.”
Lindsay: Ooh, I like that. I like that. So the idea here is it’s more important to – (right). So we need to surround ourselves with people who take action and who dream, but more importantly to surround ourselves with people who believe in us…
Lindsay: …and our actions.
Lindsay: So Christie have you had, (you know), what kinds of people do you hang out with in New York. (I mean), how is your social circle supporting you?
Christie: Yeah. That’s a good question. (Um), well, (um), my sister, she’s a big part.
She’s in New York City right now. And she has always shown that she believes in me. And (um), my boyfriend actually, (um), he – one thing I really liked about one of our conversations when we were first dating is I told him – I said, “(You know), I would love to build a city one day.” (Like), (you know), just a real community because I want it to be bike-friendly and I wanna (want to) be able to bike and not be afraid I’m gonna (going to) be hit by a car.
Lindsay: I love it.
Christie: And I have this passion for it and I still do because I don’t like driving.
That’s why I’m in New York. And most of the time, the dates I had been on, (you know), they kinda (kind of) just pause and look at me and I can just hear what they’re thinking, “Oh my gosh.”
Christie: “She’s crazy. That’s, that’s never gonna (going to) happen.” (Um), but the first thing he said to me was, “Well, (you know), you know what you should do, then you should buy land now because it’s gonna (going to) be cheaper.”
Lindsay: I love that.
Christie: And I listened. He – thank you. You, (you know), he believe in me and, (um), it wasn’t even a question. (Uh), so that was, that was kinda (kind of) nice and that was big for me.
Lindsay: Aw, that’s huge. (You know), that’s fantastic. I love that. And that’s a real, true test. (You know), that response, that initial response of his is, is a true (test-), testimony essentially to the kind of guy he is and the way he thinks.
It sounds like he’s on the same wavelength as you. And I also just want to mention for our listeners, (you know), guys, this can apply for your English and also for your life as, as everything else that we talk about on this show can, (you know). If you share, if you have a dream of being fluent or, (you know), with, (you know), going to Hollywood and becoming an actor as we talked about a few episode ago and you share that with someone close to you, (you know), you want that person to say “Okay. So let’s book your ticket, (right) to Hollywood.” Or, (you know), “What’s your plan?” Not, “Oh, I don’t think you can do that.” Right.
Lindsay: So we wanna (want to) make sure that we’re surrounded by people who are supporting us.
Christie: Yeah. Yeah. Could I (um), add something about one key way…
Lindsay: Please do.
Christie: …to do that?
Christie: (Um), yeah, well, wh-what I learned is, is that we really need mentors in our life and the reason is because they’ve been there and done that and they see what’s possible. They see us and they often see what we are possible to do that we (kind of) don’t know or believe we can do ourselves because we haven’t done it yet.
Kristin: It’s a totally fine position to be in, but when we talk to our mentors sometimes the biggest thing you get is their faith in your dream and therefore you adding faith to your dream.
Kristin: An example I can give is that, (um), Darren Kimura is a, (um), actually my cousin, but also is an amazing entrepreneur. He started an (uh), (um), energy efficiency lighting, (uh), company. (Um), and so, (you know), I, I, reach out to him once in a while and I think I – a similar conversation I said to him, ‘Well, I, I think I would like maybe to be like an (inaudible) or something” and I was just really embarrassed. And he said to me – and I was (like), (you know), I was really embarrassed because also it, it seems almost, (um), (self)-, like a selfish goal. (Like), I’m not, like I wanna (want to) start this new company that’s going to cure cancer.
Lindsay: Ah, I see. I see.
Christie: (Um), and I was embarrassed and I was like, “Yeah, but I mean I kind of…” And he goes – he says to me… he goes – he pauses…
Christie: …he thinks, he looks at me and he says, “I think that’s a great goal.” He’s like – he goes, “(You know), Christie, I think you need to write a book.”
Christie: “And then it needs to be like a bestseller. So I think you need to write a book because that’s really gonna (going to) help what you’re, what you’retrying to do.” And I said – and I was like – and he was dead serious. He wasn’t saying it like, ‘Oh, that would be cool if you were…” He was just like, “Oh, this is what you need to do…” as if – and it was complete faith that that’s – and I could do it. And it was very encouraging and just those words. I – honestly, they’ve – that was two years ago. I’ve (re-), I often reach for them (um), to…
Lindsay: Oh, yeah.
Christie: …give me faith when I don’t.
Lindsay: I like that Christie. That’s awesome. So it sounds like the parallel here is the people that you wanna (want to) be around when you share, (you know), your dream with them, they don’t have a block up in their mind.
Instead they actually suggest an action, like, “Maybe you should buy the land because it’s going to be expensive later,” or “Maybe you should write a book.” (You know) they go straight to the action.
Lindsay: So you can tell that these guys have a complete, completely different paradigm in their mind about how life works.
Lindsay: And that’s such an important shift that, (you know), we all (kind of) need to go through on some level, but once we do, then we need to surround ourselves with people who have gone through that shift and one really good way to do that, Christie, is what you’ve said is to get mentors.
Christie: (Uh-huh). Yes.
Lindsay: Yeah, I love that. I love that. That’s fantastic, (you know). And I’ve been part of a mastermind group, (um), for English entrepreneurs, online ESL entrepreneurs over the past, (you know), six or eight weeks and it’s been really helpful, (you know), to just work, sit down for one hour every week and see what these guys are doing because you see what’s possible, right?
Lindsay: No one in the group is a genius. We’re not Einstein. We’re all – we’re just normal people that have dreams and we’re doing our best to make them come true by showing up every day.
Lindsay: Yeah, yeah. I love that. Awesome. Well, thank you Christie. This has been (su-), again, super empowering and I hope that you guys are gonna (going to) take this, (you know), this, these thoughts and go out there and, (you know), make some great friends who are gonna (going to) support you in your English goals and your life.
Christie: Yeah. All right. Sounds good. Go out and get them.
Lindsay: Yeah. Thanks guys. Bye.
Lindsay: If you wanna (want to) put your ears into English more often, be sure to subscribe to our podcast in iTunes on your computer or on your smartphone. Thanks so much for listening and see you next time.
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