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Dating Vocabulary Lesson

Hello and welcome to the vocabulary lesson for the conversation called “Dating.” Now this is a conversation Joe and I were having about some of our friends and the different dates that they have gone on.

So let’s begin.

Joe starts out by saying, “Hey, I ran into my friend Jackie today downtown.” Now hey… That’s just kind of a filler word here. It doesn’t really mean anything. He’s just trying to get my attention. It’s just something you can say at the beginning of a sentence. So he’s saying, “Hey, I ran into my friend Jackie today downtown. Ran into… Now that’s an idiom. And what he’s saying here is, hey I saw my friend Jackie by surprise today. Or I unexpectedly saw my friend. Or I wasn’t expecting to see her. Ran into.

An example of this would be: One time I was at a street festival here in San Francisco. And ran into a friend, who I wasn’t even expecting to be there. Ran into.

Then I go on to say, “Hey, you used to work with her, right?”

So I’m saying, hey you used to work with her, didn’t you?

And then Joe says, “Yeah, yeah, I don’t think you’ve met her yet but, uh…” So he’s saying yeah, yeah. Yeah is just slang or informal or casual for yes. You won’t really see that in written English, but you will definitely hear it in conversational English. So he’s saying, yeah I don’t think you’ve met my friend Jackie. Met as in, I don’t think you’ve been introduced to her.

And then I go on to say, “Yeah, I can’t believe…”

Or I’m surprised.

“I haven’t met her actually, but…”

Now actually here is just kind of a filler word. It doesn’t really mean that much.

Then Joe goes on to say, “Yeah, y’know, I well, I don’t see her that often.” Often meaning much. He’s saying, I don’t see her that often. I don’t see her that much.

“I guess…”

I guess, or I think.

And then I say, “Oh.” And then Joe goes on to say, “one of the reasons I don’t see her that often…” Or I don’t see her that much.

“is because she’s been really busy…”

Really or very busy.

“uh, because she’s in a new relationship she said.”

So… In a new relationship. Or that could also mean… His friend Jackie, she’s just started dating someone.

She’s in this new relationship.

And I say, “Oh.”

Like wow. Really?

Then Joe says, “Yeah, you should have seen her. It was like, uh, it was so cute to see her. She was like bursting at the seams she was so happy.”

Like, in this situation… I’ve mentioned this in other lessons. It’s just a filler word. Doesn’t really mean anything. So she was like bursting at the seams. Now bursting at the seams… That’s an idiom. Basically it’s saying she was very excited. She was so happy. Bursting at the seams. An example of bursting at the seams would be: When I first met Joe, ten months ago on this day actually (the 21st), I felt so excited and happy. I was bursting at the seams.

Then I… I just laugh.

Because I can imagine his friend Jackie just… Even though I haven’t met her. I can just picture this woman who’s, as he’s describing, she’s so cute. She’s just bursting at the seams. She’s so happy because she’s in this new relationship.

Okay moving on then Joe says, “Because I guess…”

Or he’s saying I think. I guess.

“the relationship is going really well…”

Or it’s going very well.

“so…” And then I say, “Oh, that’s good.” And Joe says, “Yeah, I’m really happy to see it too because I know that she’s been really looking for someone.”

Now looking for someone… That’s an idiom and what he’s basically saying is she’s been trying to find someone to date. She’s been trying to find someone. An example of looking for someone would be: My friend Tina is always looking for someone, but she can never seem to meet someone she likes. Looking for someone. So yeah Joe is talking about how he is happy to see that… See her, see his friend so happy.

Because she’s been looking for someone. She’s been trying to find someone to date.

And he goes on to say, “And, uh, y’know, she’d been doing the online dating thing for, I don’t know, over a year.”

So he’s saying, she’d been meeting people. Or trying to date people online or from the internet. And she’d been doing this for over a year. For more than a year.

And he goes on to say, “And, I mean…”

Or, what I’m trying to say.

“it seemed like she was having, uh, she wasn’t having a lot of luck with it, so…” So he’s saying, she wasn’t having a lot of luck. She wasn’t finding men to date. She just wasn’t having very good luck with it.

And then I go on to say, “Oh, really?” And Joe says, “Yeah.” And then I say, “Well, it’s good she’s finally found someone that she’s compatible with.”

Compatible. So what I’m saying is, it’s good she’s finally found someone she gets along well with.

And then Joe says, “Yeah. I remember when she first started out she told me about this one guy she met and he was a total loser.”

So he’s saying, I remember when she first started out dating. She told me about this one guy. Guy is slang for man. So she told me… So he’s saying, she told me about this one man she met and he was a total loser.

A total loser just simply means not a good person to date because maybe the guy is unsuccessful. Or maybe he doesn’t have a job. Or maybe he’s mean to his mother. Or maybe he’s not well-educated… He doesn’t have a good education. Total loser. An example of total loser would be: My mom likes to remind me of how I dated total losers in high school. She thinks it’s because I wanted to try and change them into better guys.

Total loser.

So then Joe goes on to say, “I mean, one thing that I remember she said was that he asked her to go out to this nice restaurant.”

So he’s saying, she’s talking about… His friend Jackie is talking about this guy when she first started doing the dating online. Or on the internet. This… This first guy she meets, he asks her to go to this nice restaurant. To this really expensive restaurant is basically what that means. Nice restaurant.

And then Joe goes on to say, “And, y’know, she wasn’t planning on, uh, having him pay for the date.” So he’s saying that Jackie, his friend, wasn’t, wasn’t thinking that this guy would pay for her date. I think in America nowadays it’s not expected for a guy to pay for the first date. But usually, or I would say most of the time, it does still happen. So she’s not thinking he’s definitely going to pay for the date.

So then Joe goes on to say, “Y’know, she was like, ‘Okay, well, y’know, I have money just in case.’

And, uh, he made her pay for the whole date.”

So Jackie wasn’t planning on this guy paying for her date. She wasn’t thinking he would pay for it. She had money just in case. She had money just to be sure. Y’know, just… Just to be sure in case he didn’t pay.

And then Joe is saying, but he did. He ended up making her pay for the whole date. For, for everything.

So I just laugh and say, “Oh my god!”

Like, I can’t believe it.

And Joe says, “I know! What the…” And he laughs. “So that was really, y’know, that was really a bad introduction…”

So what he’s saying is, that was really a bad first meeting. So Jackie… his friend Jackie… This was a bad first meeting for her. A bad first meeting with this guy. Because he made her pay for the whole date. Like I said, even though it’s not expected in American culture anymore, it’s still… It’s just nice on the first date if a guy pays.

Then I just laugh, agreeing it was a bad introduction. And Joe goes on to say, “to the, to that guy and to the online dating world.”

So he’s saying, that was a bad introduction to this guy and to the online dating world. So here, bad introduction to the online dating world… Introduction would just mean it was a bad start to the dating world. It was a bad first meeting for this guy… for her to meet this guy. And it was a bad start to the dating world.

And then I say, “Yeah, I would say so.”

So I’m just completely agreeing.

And Joe says, “Because that was the first person she went out with.” So he’s saying yeah. It was such a bad introduction. A bad way to start dating on the internet. A bad first date to have with this guy, who makes her pay for the food at the restaurant. It was just a bad introduction.

Now went out with… When he says, because that was the first person she went out with… What he is saying is, that was the first person she went on a date with. Went out with. For example: I remember I went out with this guy one time on our first date. I was driving and we ended up getting into a car accident. Luckily we didn’t get hurt. But it was not a good way to end our first date. Went out with.

Then I go on to say, “Well…” After laughing, “Well, speaking…” Or talking.

“of blind dates, ‘coz online dating is pretty much blind dates…” Okay blind dates, or blind date… That’s an idiom. That just means going out on a date with someone you’ve never met. Blind date. So I’m saying, yeah speaking or talking about blind dates, because it is. When you’re meeting someone on the internet, that’s like blind dating. An example of blind dating or blind date: I’ve never been on a blind date before. I’ve always known the person before going on the date. Blind date. Now when I say, ‘coz online dating is pretty much blind dates… What I’m saying there… ‘Coz. ‘Coz is short for because. This is something else you won’t see in written English, but you will hear it in conversational English. ‘Coz.

Okay, then moving on Joe says, “Yeah.”

Agreeing with me.

And then I say, “or blind dating, I should say, um. There’s, I have a friend that I am no longer in touch with and before we lost touch I can remember her telling me a story about going out on a blind date.” So in the beginning, I’m just correcting myself from talking about blind dates to blind dating. I’m just correcting myself. And then I’m talking about that I have this friend that I’m no longer in touch with. In touch with… Now that’s an idiom meaning in contact with. I no longer have this friend I am in contact with. An example of in touch with would be: When I was living in Korea, Thailand and Japan, I was pretty good about keeping in touch with all of my family and friends. Because it was so easy to e-mail. In touch with. So I have this friend that I no longer keep in touch with and before we lost touch… Lost touch is an idiom. It’s the opposite of in touch with. So no longer in contact. My friend and I, we were no longer in contact with each other. Lost touch. An example of this is: It’s sad to say but I have a friend in Atlanta, Georgia who I have not spoken to in almost two years. I have lost touch with her. Lost touch. So I have this friend, I am no longer in touch with her. I am no longer in contact with her and before we lost touch… Before we got out of contact with each other… I can remember her telling me a story about going on a blind date. So she didn’t know the guy.

“And this guy, he was such a total loser. He showed up.”

So he… he… showed up. He got to wherever they were meeting.

“He was already two sheets to the wind.”

Two sheets to the wind. Meaning he was already very drunk or he was very drunk. He’d had a lot of alcohol to drink. This is how he shows up to the date. He was two sheets to the wind. For example, of two sheets to the wind: I had a lot to drink at a wedding a few months ago. I was two sheets to the wind. So this is my friend’s first impression of this guy. Or her first thought of him. This guy shows up. He’s drunk.

“This guy was just trashed.”

Trashed meaning like two sheets to the wind. Very drunk, had a lot of alcohol to drink. Trashed. An example of trashed: My friend Tim likes to drink a lot of beer. Therefore he ends up getting trashed a lot.

Moving along in the conversation Joe says, “And he stunk of alcohol?” So, stunk, or he smelled of alcohol?

And I said, “Yeah!” Joes says, “Oh great.”

Now oh great here… He’s not saying that in a good way, a positive way. He’s saying it more like, oh great. I can’t believe that.

And then I say, “Yeah, exactly. Yeah, needless to say, that, that date was a disaster. She didn’t want to see him again.”

So I’m saying, yeah needless to say or I don’t even have to say that, that date was a disaster. She didn’t want to see him again. So, disaster… It ended up badly, was not good. And, she didn’t want to see him again. She didn’t want to go out on another date with this guy.

And then Joe says, “Yeah.”

Like agreeing with me. I can only imagine. I can only agree.

And then I say, “But, yeah, I mean she had a horrible time with, um, dating.” I’m saying she had a terrible time with dating.

“I mean she went on a lot of blind dates and, just… They were all pretty disastrous…” So they were pretty terrible.

“actually. But I will say before we lost touch…”

So before we got out of contact with each other.

“she finally met someone that was head and shoulders above the rest.” Head and shoulders above the rest. Much better than the rest. Head and shoulders above the rest. So I’m saying my friend finally met someone that was really good. He was better than the rest. An example of this would be: My cousin is a very good hairstylist. Hairstylist is someone who cuts hair. So she cuts hair for a living. She’s the only person that I’ll let cut my hair. She’s head and shoulders above the rest.

And then Joe goes on to say, “Oh, that’s great. Yeah.”

Now here he is saying, oh that’s great in a positive way. Like good… Y’know, it’s good to hear that your friend finally met someone that she really liked. That… Who was really good.

And I say, “Yeah.” And then Joe says, “You know, ah, its funny to hear Bill speaking about, uh, all the times he’s gone out on, y’know, blind dates through y’know that, people he met over the internet.

Because he’s been doing it for a couple of years. And he, he just always has a funny spin on things when he tells a story. I don’t even know where he comes up with some of this stuff. It’s so funny.” So Joe is talking about how it’s really funny to hear his friend Bill talk about the blind dates. The dates he’s gone out on, y’know, not knowing people. Funny to hear Bill talk about these blind dates from people he’s met on the internet. Because he’s been doing it for a couple of years. He’s been dating people from the internet for two years. He just always has a funny spin on things when he tells a story. Funny spin on things.

That’s an idiom meaning he has a funny way of looking at things. Funny spin on things. An example of that would be: Tim can really make me laugh. He has a funny spin on things whenever he talks about something.

Funny spin on things. And then Joe goes on to say, yeah, he has such a funny way of looking at things. I don’t even know where he comes up with some of this stuff. Like where… Where some of these stories come from. They’re just so funny.

So then I go on to say, “Oh, that guy cracks me up.”

So I’m talking about Bill. Bill really cracks me up. He’s got all these funny stories. Cracks me up. Makes me laugh. An example of cracks me up would be: I like when I meet people who really crack me up because I like to laugh. I love to laugh. Cracks me up.

Then Joe says, “Yeah, yeah, I know. But, uh, he actually, I think one of his problems is… The guy’s like 35 and he’s trying to date 20 year olds, so, you know…”

So he’s saying, I think one reason Bill has all these funny stories, why he has all these problems when, when he’s going on these blind dates… Bill is 35 years old and he’s trying to date 20 year olds.

And I say, “Oh no.”

Like, oh, I don’t… I can’t believe that.

And Joe says, “of course there’s going to be like a big difference in, uh, interests and, uh, usually maturity also.”

So what he’s saying is a 35 year old trying to date a 20 year old… Some people do it and that’s fine. Other times there’s, like Joe is saying, there’s just, can be a big difference in the interests that those two people would have. Or immaturity. Maturity being like, in this example… Like, or in this situation… Like their thoughts would be really different. Y’know, one person being older and the other person being younger.

And then I say, I go on to say, “Yeah!”

I’m agreeing with him.

“That’s just, that seems like it would be a recipe for disaster.” Recipe for disaster. What I’m saying here is it seems like that would be something that would likely end badly. So not end good. Recipe for disaster. An example of that would be: Lying is a recipe for disaster.

After someone tells a lie, something bad usually happens. A recipe for disaster.

And then Joe says, “Yeah, yeah, I know what you’re saying, so…” And then I say, “Well, I think, um, dating has really changed a good bit, y’know, back in the day, when my…our parents were dating. It was just so different.” So what I’m saying is dating has really changed a good bit. A good bit meaning a lot. For example: I drink a good bit of water throughout the day because drinking water is good for you. A good bit. So I’m saying, yeah, dating has really changed a lot. It’s changed a good bit, y’know, back in the day… Back in the day meaning a long time ago. For example: Back in the day when my grandmother was a child, no one had TVs.

No one had televisions. Back in the day. So yeah, a long time ago… Back in the day, when my or our parents were dating… Y’know, I started out saying my parents but it’s his parents, too. Same generation.

I’m just saying yeah, it was just so different. So different when our parents were dating from… from… us, people our age dating now, today.

And then Joe says, “Oh, it was totally a different story then.”

So he’s saying, it was completely a different story then. And a different story here means not the same then.

It was not the same. An example of this could be: These days children learn how to use computers in school. Back when I was a child, it was a totally different story. We didn’t learn how to use computers. A different story.

And then I go on to say, “I mean for one thing, well, moving even beyond dating.” Or talking about other things besides dating.

“Like once people got serious, they didn’t live together before they got married.” And Joe says, “No, no.” And I say, “You know?”

Like, you agree?

And I start to say, “And I…” And then Joe says, before I can finish, “That was like, viewed as a sin…” So he’s saying that was seen as a sin. That was something that was not good. Back when our parents were dating, you just, after dating, when you start to get serious with someone, two people before they got married… They just would not live together.

And then I say, “Yeah!”

I agree.

And then Joe says, “because the world, y’know, here in these… Here it was a lot more, uh, it was a much more religious time.”

So what he’s saying is, religious time… Religion… Christianity being the biggest religion in America. He’s saying at that time there were a lot of stronger Christian beliefs then. A strong Christian belief would not be for people to live together before they got married.

And then I say, “Right.”

Agreeing with Joe.

And then I go on to say, “But I’d even be willing to bet that they didn’t have s@x before marriage.” And Joe says, “Oh, c-…”

He starts to say, oh come on. Like, oh you can’t believe that.

He goes on to say, “I think that they were saying they didn’t have s@x before marriage but I’m sure it was happening…” And I say, “You think?” And then Joe, “behind closed doors. Oh definitely!

Come on, y’know!”

So behind closed doors. He’s saying yeah, it was happening. But it was done in private. It was not happening where people could see it. It was behind closed doors. An example of behind closed doors: Growing up I can remember my mom not wanting people to know that she smoked. She only did it behind closed doors.

Then I go on to say, “Well, where would they do it?”

So in other words, where would they have s@x?

“Go park a car?”

Would they go have s@x in a car?

And Joe says, “Well that is one, that is one…”

He’s saying, that would be one way.

“yeah, I think they did actually. Because back then people would live at home until they got married.” So that’s really, y’know I guess they could go to a hotel. But that would be expensive. So since people lived at home until they got married, the only way to go have s@x, he’s saying, would be… Or one way would be to go and have s@x in a car.

So then I say, “Right.”

Agreeing with him.

And then he says, “So they would, I think they would have to go… I mean it was kind of rare…” Or y’know, didn’t happen often. Didn’t happen very much.

“for someone to move out of the house before they got married. So, y’know, they probably didn’t have their own apartment. So…” And I say, “Right.”

Agreeing with him.

And he says, “Yeah, and y’know…” And I start to say, “Well, speaki-…” Starting to say speaking but Joe interrupts me then. He starts to say something.

Joe says, “another…” And then I say, “I’m sorry. Go ahead…” So we’re kind of talking both at the same time and I’m telling Joe, oh just go ahead. You go ahead and talk.

So then Joe says, “thing that was really weird…”

So he’s saying, you know another thing that was really weird. Or another thing that was really strange…

“if you think about it also, is people just didn’t get divorced back then.” So he’s saying if you really think about it, a really strange thing, or a really weird thing is that people didn’t get divorced. They didn’t end their marriage back then.

And I’m saying, “Right, right.”

Agreeing with him.

Then Joe says, “Like now, I, I heard something and I, I think this is pretty accurate.” Or he’s saying, I think it’s pretty correct.

“50 percent of all marriages here in the United States end in divorce.” And I say, “Oh my god.” Like, I can’t believe that.

And Joe says, “I mean, its crazy to…”

He’s saying it’s unusual to…

“y’know, that you and I, uh, we’re both like, y’know, have parents who are still together. Its kind of…” And I’m saying, “Uh-huh.”

Like, I know. I agree. It is very unusual that our parents are still together. They’re not divorced.

And then Joe goes on to say, “its, uh, its uncommon, I guess…”

And what he’s saying is, it’s not usual.

And he starts to say, “I guess…” And I say, “It is.”

Agreeing, again, it is uncommon. It’s not usual.

And then Joe goes on to say, “is the word I’m looking for. Because when you look at our friends, um, most of them have parents that are divorced, who are divorced, excuse me.” He corrects himself. So he’s saying uncommon is the word I’m looking for.

“it’s uncommon…”

It’s not usual. Because our friends, and this is true, most of our friends… Their parents are divorced. They are no longer together.

And then I say, “Yep.”

Yep just meaning yes. A slang word for yes.

“Yeah, we’re definitely not the norm, or our families aren’t.” So what I’m saying is, not the norm. Our families… We’re not common. We’re not like everyone else. Or our families are not common. Our families are not like everyone else. For example: These days in America, it’s the norm for people to start college the year after high school. The norm.

And then I go on to say, “But, you know, it made me think, um, speaking of living together. My mom, I was talking about it with her the other day and she actually called it shacking up.” Shacking up… When two people who are not married live together. That’s what shacking up means. For example: My friend Kayla and her boyfriend live together. Her mom told her that she doesn’t like them shacking up. Shacking up.

And then Joe goes on to say, “Oh, that’s funny. That’s like a term…” Or that’s like a word….

“that’s no longer used.” And then I end the conversation by saying, “Yeah.” I agree.

Okay, this concludes the vocabulary lesson for the conversation “Dating.” So listen to this a few times in a relaxed way, if you need to. Until you have a basic understanding of the vocabulary. Then go to the mini-story.

See you next time. Bye.