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Bad Pickup Lines

Welcome to English as a Second Language Podcast number 119: Bad Pickup Lines.

Welcome to English as a Second Language Podcast episode 119. I’m your host, Dr. Jeff McQuillan, coming to you from the beautiful city of Los Angeles, in the state of California.

Today’s podcast is called “Bad Pickup Lines.” And a pickup line is something that a man says to a woman when he’s trying to ask her out on a date, to show he’s romantically interested. Let’s get started!

[start of story]

My friend and I were at a restaurant waiting for our dates to arrive. We sat at the bar and tried to get the bartender’s attention to order a couple of drinks.

My friend, Tanya, is very pretty. She is always being hit on by men. So, it was no surprise that five minutes after we sat down, a guy got up from the other side of the bar and walked over to us. He sat down next to Tanya.

He looked at both of us and said, “Hi, I saw you two beautiful ladies sitting by yourselves over here. Could I buy you two a drink?”

Tanya looked at me and rolled her eyes and said, “No, thanks. We’re waiting for our boyfriends.”

We both thought that he would take the hint and get lost, but he didn’t.

Instead, he looked at Tanya and said, “Do you come here often?”

Tanya tried to ignore him, but he wouldn’t give up.

He said, “You look like an angel. Does heaven know you’ve escaped?”

That pickup line was so lame that we almost burst out laughing. Luckily, we didn’t need to keep a straight face for long. Our dates walked in and the guy left. Charlie, my date, apologized for keeping us waiting. I told him that it was no big deal. We had plenty of entertainment.

[end of story]

Well, today we talk about a social event common in the whole world, about men who are interested in women. And this particular podcast is one from a woman’s perspective - from a woman’s “point of view, we would say. “Point of view” being her view of it, her side of it. And in this podcast, it opens by the woman saying that “My friend and I were at a restaurant, waiting for our dates to arrive.” “Our dates” (dates) are the - in this case, the men that they are going out with - usually, their boyfriend. So, a “date” is someone that - either a boyfriend or a girlfriend. The two women sat at the bar. “To sit at the bar” means that you are sitting in one of the seats right next to the place where they serve alcohol, beer, wine and so forth. “To sit at the bar” is the expression. Usually those chairs are called “stools” (stools). A “stool” is a type of chair - usually a very tall chair. Anyway, they were sitting at the bar, and they tried to get the bartender’s attention.” “To get someone’s attention” means that you try to get them to notice you. A “bartender” - all one word - (bartender) - is someone who serves, who makes and serves drinks at a bar.

One of the women, named Tanya, is very pretty. And she is always being “hit on” by men. “To be hit on” - two words - (hit) (on) - “to be hit on” - it means that men come up to her and ask her out on a date to show their romantic interest - this is to be hit on.” And, of course, a man can hit on a woman - and that’s the expression - or a woman can hit on a man, when you are showing that you are interested in them romantically – that can be by smiling or the way you use your body, and, of course, what you say. But you know that already.

Well, it was “no surprise” that five minutes after they sat down, someone came over to the two women. “It was no surprise” is an expression we use when we mean it was expected. We knew this was going to happen. It was no surprise that this man came over and sat next to Tanya. And he said to them, “I saw you two beautiful ladies sitting by yourselves. Could I buy you a drink?” Well, there are two very common English phrases here that men use in trying to approach, in trying to talk to women that they do not know-to strangers. “You two beautiful ladies sitting here by yourselves,” meaning you’re not with another man - is what he’s saying. And it’s very common in the United States, and probably, in many countries to a man, to buy a woman a drink and this is also the way of indicating that he is romantically interested. “Could I buy you two-you two women - a drink?”

Well, Tanya looked at her friend and “rolled her eyes.” “To roll (roll) your eyes” means that you look up and look around usually looking up, showing that you think that this person is not very intelligent or that you don’t believe something or _ that you disagree with someone - those are all times where you would roll your eyes. Well, she’s, Tanya, is rolling her eyes because the man’s pickup line - remember “pickup line” is the sentence or the phrase that a man uses to show a woman he’s interested - “Could I buy you a drink?” - is a very old and not very original line.

Well, Tanya says, “No, thanks” and that they were waiting for their boyfriends. Unfortunately, the man “did not take the hint.” “To take the hint” means to understand what the other person is saying. Usually, the other person isn’t being direct, or is trying to give them the message in a very nice, indirect, polite way. And sometimes, this doesn’t always work. People don’t quite understand. And this is what this man in the story - “he doesn’t take the hint.” He doesn’t understand that the woman is not interested in him. He doesn’t get lost. “To get lost here means - informal expression - it means to leave. But it usually means that the other person doesn’t want you there. So, if you say to someone “Get lost,” what you’re saying is I want you to leave right away. I don’t like you.

Well, this man doesn’t get lost. Instead, he says to Tanya, “Do you come here often?” - meaning do you come to this bar a lot. Well, again, this is a very old and well known pickup line in English in the United States. “Do you come here often?” - it’s so bad, it’s not something that any woman would be very receptive - not something that a woman would want to hear because it’s almost a joke to say that to someone because it is so old and so unoriginal, so not original. But this man says it anyway, “Do you come here often?” And Tanya tries to ignore him - pretend he’s not there. But he wouldn’t give up.” “To give up” - two words - is to stop, to stop doing something. I tried, for example, to learn how to play the recorder - the musical instrument - the recorder, but it was too hard so I gave up. I stopped trying.

Well, this man doesn’t give up. Instead, he uses another very bad pickup line. He says to the woman, “You look like an angel. Does heaven know you’ve escaped?” Well, the first part of that expression “You look like an angel - an “angel” here, of course, is somebody from heaven, someone who is supposed to be, here, very beautiful. So, someone says, “You look like an angel” they mean you look very pretty. You look very beautiful. And then he says, “Does heaven know you’ve escaped?” Well, angels are supposed to live in heaven, right? The angels live in heaven and since she is so beautiful, she must be an angel, and so he asked, “Does heaven know that you’ve escaped,” meaning you’ve got out of heaven and now you are here at this bar. Well, the women think that that pickup line was “very lame.” They say, “It was so lame” (lame) - “to be lame” here - it’s an informal expression - slang expression. It means to be really bad, to be very weak, to be very unoriginal. When we say something is “lame” we mean it’s bad.

It’s very bad. We often use that in talking about excuses. Somebody gives a “lame excuse,” meaning they try to tell you why they didn’t do something but it isn’t a very good reason. Well, this is a “lame” pickup line. In fact, it was so lame that the two women almost “burst out laughing.” “To burst out” or “bust out laughing” - means to start laughing very hard suddenly, usually because of something that someone else has said or done.

Well, they said they didn’t need to keep a straight face for long. “To keep a straight face” (straight) - a straight face means not to smile, not to laugh. Usually means not to laugh. So, someone is telling you something that you don’t believe and you think is very funny, but you keep a straight face - means you don’t laugh because that might bother the other person or that might hurt the other person and so, to keep a straight face” means to not laugh when you want to laugh. Well, the reason they didn’t need to keep a straight face for long for a long time - or for much longer, is that their dates arrived. One of the dates - the boyfriends - says that he apologized for keeping them waiting.” “To keep someone waiting” means they arrive somewhere first and you are late. And you are “keeping them waiting.”

I should say too before I forget that, I said a “date” is often your boyfriend or girlfriend. Sometimes, you can have a date, someone you are interested in romantically, but you don’t consider that person your boyfriend or girlfriend yet. So, before you have this more permanent relationship with them, you can have a date. So, that’s just a clarification. Well, the woman at the end of the story tells her date that it was no big deal. The expression “it’s no big deal” (deal) means it’s not important - not something that you should worry about.

Now let’s listen to the dialogue this time at a native rate of speech.

[start of story]

My friend and I were at a restaurant waiting for our dates to arrive. We sat at the bar and tried to get the bartender’s attention to order a couple of drinks.

My friend, Tanya, is very pretty. She is always being hit on by men. So, it was no surprise that five minutes after we sat down, a guy got up from the other side of the bar and walked over to us. He sat down next to Tanya.

He looked at both of us and said, “Hi, I saw you two beautiful ladies sitting by yourselves over here. Could I buy you two a drink?”

Tanya looked at me and rolled her eyes and said, “No, thanks. We’re waiting for our boyfriends.”

We both thought that he would take the hint and get lost, but he didn’t.

Instead, he looked at Tanya and said, “Do you come here often?”

Tanya tried to ignore him, but he wouldn’t give up.

He said, “You look like an angel. Does heaven know you’ve escaped?”

That pickup line was so lame that we almost burst out laughing. Luckily, we didn’t need to keep a straight face for long. Our dates walked in and the guy left. Charlie, my date, apologized for keeping us waiting. I told him that it was no big deal. We had plenty of entertainment.

(end of story]

From Los Angeles, California, I’m Jeff McQuillan. We’ll see you next time on ESL Podcast.

ESL Podcast is a production of the Center for Educational Development in Los Angeles, California. This podcast is copyright 2005. No part of this podcast may be sold or redistributed without the expressed written permission of the Center for Educational Development.