Page 36. Watch the Lecture. Part D. LISTEN FOR DETAILS

Unit four

page 36

watch the lecture

part D: listen for details

good morning everybody; today I want to talk about negotiation.

first I’d like to talk about why negotiation is so important for business and then we’ll talk about different approaches to negotiation.

after that, we’ll talk about some techniques for negotiating successfully.

So, why are negotiation skills so important?

every time you need to resolve a problem or reach an agreement with other people, you need to be able to negotiate.

we need to negotiate every day with our coworkers, our boss and people from other businesses, right?

so negotiating is a skill that you will use often as professional.

and knowing how to negotiate well, will help ensure your success in business.

the problem is that, many people are not very good negotiators; that’s because many people perceive only two approaches to negotiation: the hard approach and the soft approach.

if you are a hard negotiator you are concerned with winning, with reaching the decision that is best for you.

you are not very concerned about the other person or your relationship with that person.

hard negotiators will concentrate on getting the decision they want.

they won’t stop, until the other person agrees.

in the end, hard negotiators may get what they want, but they may hurt the relationship with the other person and that person may not want to work with them in the future.

so in contrast, soft negotiators are more concerned with avoiding conflict, avoiding disagreement.

they give in quickly because they don’t want to have conflict with the other person.

this approach to negotiation isn’t good because soft negotiators often agree to decisions that are bad for them or bad for the business.

Subsequently, they might be unhappy or disappointed because they believe they’ve lost negotiation.

So, instead of a hard or soft approach, successful negotiators like myself, take a win-win approach where there isn’t a winner or loser.

in the win-win approach, negotiators try to confer on a decision.

to agree on something that benefits both sides involved.

they also try to keep a good working relationship with each other, so they can continue to work together in the future.

Then, how do you suppose they can do this?

how can you negotiate a solution that is a win-win for both people?

Well there are two important techniques that will help you to do this.

the first technique is to listen and to understand; to listen and to understand each other side of the problem.

the second technique is to work together to reach a solution; a solution that is good for both people.

let’s look at an example.

imagine you work for a company that makes clothing; to make your clothing you need to buy fabric from another company.

Now let’s say you like to buy fabric from Joe; because his company makes good fabric and they sell it at a fair price.

but recently you had a problem, the problem is that Joe’s company has been late sending you the fabric that you need.

this is causing you problems because then your company can’t make your clothing on time.

so what should you do?

the first thing you need to do is to make sure you understand each other’s side of the problem.

to do that, you need to listen carefully to each other.

so first you should listen carefully to Joe side of the problem.

Joe might say: oh we’re having problems with output because the machines at my company are so old and so on…

don’t interrupt him or talk about your side of the problem; instead just listen and make sure you understand him.

after you have heard and understood the other person, you should explain your circumstances.

when you do, don’t blame the other person for the problem.

if you blame the person, they may get angry and may not want to talk to you anymore.

one way to avoid blaming someone is to use “I statements”.

that means you start sentences with the word I instead of you.

so don’t say to Joe “you are causing us problems”, that might make Joe angry.

instead you could say “I am worried because the fabric is late and we can’t make our clothing”.

this way, you are explaining how you feel and how the problem affects you.

now that you both listens and explains your side of the problem, you are ready to find a solution together.

this step can be difficult because each person may want a different solution; but instead of arguing for your solution, you should talk about all the possible solutions and then agree on one that is good for both of you.

for example, both you and Joe might agree that you will buy some fabric from another company now and some fabric from Joe’s company later.

in this solution you both win; because you get the fabric you need now, and Joe can continue to sell you fabric in the future.

so as you can see, if both people in a negotiation try to understand each other and work together, then both of them can win and feel happy with the solution.